Postcard from my momma

Doree Shafrir, formerly of Gawker, currently of the New York Observer, has started a new Tumblr called Postcards From Yo Momma, basically random emails that her mom sends her? Anyway, I thought it was funny, so I thought I’d copy/paste an email I recently got from my mother. She was in England on business and I overdrafted my Wells Fargo account, per always, and she forwarded the overdraft email to me, like, it’s MY account, Mom, if you got that email so did I. J/k, it was sweet, she was very concerned. Just shows to go you that no matter how old you are, you’re still somebody’s kid. Anyway, I emailed back to tell her about Joanna offering me representation and this was her response:

England is fine. I wanted to tell you that The Guardian newspaper has a special insert each day of the week this week, a small pamphlet of selected poetry for ten selected top poets. Included are Slyvia Plath, TS Eliot, Auden, etc. ONLY in England. Anyway, I read in TS Eliot’s bio that he worked for as an editor for Faber and Faber for 40 years, all while writing poetry and becoming famous in his own right. That made me think of you. So, I’m really glad to hear about Joanna. NOW, will you let me read your book?

[Redacted]

Best part? I had to redact her sign-off because she for some reason signs all her emails to me with her first name, not “Mom.” I do not know why. I asked her once and she was like, “Well, I’m so used to doing it for work emails, it’s just a reflex.” So…shrug, I guess. It’s very…professional. I did not answer the email, because I didn’t want to say NO, you can’t read it, you won’t even like it because it has sex and violence and drugs and drinking and swearing in it and you don’t approve of those things. Seriously? People are always shocked that I didn’t watch Beverly Hills 90210 as a kid and I’m like, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I wasn’t allowed to watch television shows where children DISRESPECTED THEIR ELDERS!

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