My mother just called me at work to see if the tax return she sent me arrived (it had) and to inform me that my amazing sixteen-year-old sister, a varsity lacrosse player, had had her best game EVR! last night. She plays goalie, and apparently she was so in the zone that she made FORTY-ONE SAVES, which I am assured (by my mother, who knows marginally more about lacrosse than I do, which is to say almost none at all) that this is a very high, impressive number and makes my sister now some sort of god at whose feet I should probably worship. Since the distance makes that very unlikely right now, this is the best I can do. Apparently, the coach of the other team came up to her and said that was the best lacrosse game he’d seen played (sadly, my sister’s team eventually lost in double overtime, but only by one point and not because of her), and my father said, “That’s the best I’ve ever seen any of my children do in a sporting event,” which is actually high praise because my brother was a varsity baseball and football all-leaguer in high school, which if you know as little about sports as I do means that he was VERY FRICKIN’ TALENTED.
My mother said, “It’s too bad it was such a small game, because a performance like that should really be in the paper.” Well, it’s not the paper, but here we go: FISHY, YOU ROCK!!! CONGRATS ON BEING SUCH AN AWESOME LACROSSE GOALIE!!